Eventually, it does have to get there.

All of the posts in this blog tend to be amended and upgraded during the weeks following their original appearance. For some reason they always abundantly present room for improvement and clarification when I reread them a week or two later. This blog is intended to be a place of mine for the solid and constructive considering of important spiritual issues. Not a place where I am showing how others are not sorting out spiritual things correctly, but rather a place where I present how to, in part, actually 'do it' correctly. To present a workable, God honoring way of 'viewing', and then 'doing' things.

And while not being able to get it said 'quite all the way' the first time, every time, it is important that it does eventually get there.

And thus, provide not just a bunch of interesting chatter for the moment, but, an interesting and useful, and yes, slow in coming, longterm record of this little spot in the world. Something becoming more useful as it gets bigger. Something, miraculously, basically sound, which lends itself from that point to be built upon.

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A Sidenote: Is it any mystery how Facebook burns precious time and leaves a person with very little of anything? The internet is an "by-itself-not-sufficient electronic reality" we roam in these days. We must take care to use it wisely.

On Dressmaking

The ladies from church hadn't had time to make her a new dress for the first day of school. Of course, with an average of 8.5 children per family, they're time-strapped!

So it was a good excuse to follow through and do something I'd been meaning to do for a while now. And I'd gotten the pattern several years ago, bought a sewing machine, even made half a dress. But she'd outgrown the patterrn so I tore apart a badly stained dress she already had and just traced it bigger.

As it was going to be made by Dad - and not a female - she had said she "might" wear it on the first day, but probably the second. She was also very justifiably suspicious of what it might look like. . . and so was I.

But the Lord was good. He'd given me patience and the ability to learn to work with my hands and it worked out better than would otherwise have been possible.

This is the third time this week, the second week of school, that she's going to wear the dress that Dad made for her to wear on the first day of school.

Now, as you can see, I have some catching up on houseword to do.

On the Liberty to Sin.

Of course, as we all know, the perfect Law of Liberty does not free us "to do", but frees us from "having to do". We have our own free will, "to do" as we will, but much of the time it will get us into trouble. And particularly with the Lord.

Christians can and still do sin, nonetheless, and . . . God forbids it. Therefore, it gets a Christian in trouble with the Lord. Since God has given us knowledge aplenty to know what sin is and how and why to avoid it. And the power - His power - to pull that off. And so we don't consciously persist in what we know to be sin.

We also know that anywhere the Spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty. Those in whom the Spirit of the Lord does not abide are the only ones who will practice sin, because, the Lord told us so in 1 John 3:9. "No one who is born of God practices sin, because the seed of God abides in him". Where the seed of God is there is no sin. Where the Lord is, there is no sin. Where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is no sin. And apart from the Spirit of the Lord, there 'is' sin, and there is also then no liberty. No liberty in sin. The person who willfully goes on sinning will separate himself from the Lord. And, apart from the Lord he can expect no liberty.

I think the following statement gives us insight as well.

Romans 11:22
"Behold then the kindness and severity of God ; to those who fell, severity, but to you, God's kindness, if you continue in His kindness ; otherwise you also will be cut off."

God's kindness is almost incomprehensible. He simply wants us to look and see that Jesus' visit to this earth was His clear and sensible way of paving the way for us back to Himself. To be His grateful sons, in His gracious kingdom. He simply wants us to desire it, Him and His kingdom. Not desire it merely in order to save our own lives (He does know our motives), because he that would seek to save his life will lose it, but, to desire it after beholding Him, and His unique love for us whom He has created. Created by Him to have a love for Him such as He has for us. He has shown us that He is a loving Creator, and one who, very understandably, does not appreciate 'not' having His great love for us reciprocated.

His liberty is conditioned upon our love for Him. For upon seeing His love and what He has done for us we are helpless to do anything other than to love Him back. Outside of that love, and the love for that Spirit of His, and the loathing of those things which He finds loathesome (that is, not lovable but despicable), namely, willful sin, there is no liberty.

Don't do it. Don't try to use the gracious law of liberty as an excuse to sin so that God's grace may abound. Because it says, "God forbid". It says if the seed of the Lord abides in you then you will not tolerate nor want to indulge in anything that resembles sin. Things profane, angry, impatient, arrogant, lawless, selfish, and so on.

Just be assured that, if you love the Spirit of the Lord, and if He knows it (and He knows your heart better than you do), then there is nothing more that you "have to do" than to go forward and enjoy His liberty and the freedom in that liberty. It's freedom(release) from the power of sin. It's the aquired power over sinning itself. And it's in the Spirit of the Lord.

Hymn: My Jesus I Love Thee

I've enjoyed playing around on this one for a long time. I finally got a few extra moments to get it recorded. Hope you like it.

My Jesus, I Love Thee

But for now, I better go and study my Anatomy and Physiology.

I got a tremendous deal on these two horses. The one on the left is a 'Morab' (his breeding is Morgan and Arabian), named Dante. He is either a genius, or he's retarded. I'll have to train him. He is 7 years old and should have been trained long ago. He's very hyper-active but intelligent. Handling as many different horses as I do daily I have come to be able to spot intelligence, versus just shear, raw nervous energy. He appears to have given up the later. Or else he's an injury just waiting to happen. We'll see. His brother next to him (and below), is a very sure-footed, powerful and smart horse, also a 'Morab', whose name is now Cappucino. Very well broke and appreciates people. I got them and one other for a song; the other I had to give to a friend who had once given me a very good horse.

I passed the pre-entrance exam for the nursing program at Nicolet College two weeks ago with a nice, confidence building percentile so I'm off and getting a head start on Anatomy and Physiology for the next semester as well as back to studying German; gardening, butchering chickens again, starting to process firewood, and by far and foremost, continuing to pour over and marvel at the things God revealed to us concerning His administration of things here on earth, ages past, and ages to come.

* * * * * *

Summers around our place - a particularly intense time for the very physically demanding vocation of horseshoeing - is punctuated with our birthdays and much gorging on DQ ice cream cake, enjoying the flowers in full bloom, and beating those hot summer evening in the house by putting on our fins and masks/snorkels and paddling our kickboards out into the middle of the lake and watching the sun disappear off the tops of the tall clouds.

The seasoning process is going very well! It takes time, hard work in this life to season, ripen. It's not an easy thing with all of the distractions in this world to become built up together with Him - and others - who have seen, rejoice in His presence, and set their eyes on things from above.

A Conversation on Divorce/Remarriage/Adultery.

Here's one I've been waiting to get at.

I stumbled upon John Howard Yoder. Lately, the past year or so, I've come across a lot of interesting and diverse perspectives on divorce and remarriage. John Howard Yoder gives us some very useful footing from which to start to seek understanding on the subject of divorce and remarriage, along biblical lines.

Here is his website at the University of Notre Dame -- you will notice that he's been dead for a few years -- and here is his article that I'll be using to get the ball rolling(if the link does not work then go most of the way down the page to Marriage, Divorce and Sexuality, and click on "One flesh Until Death...). It's a very useful piece of insight into what the Bible says about divorce/remarriage/adultery. An exciting topic.

I will also bring in at least two passages that he does not, which will be John 8, the woman caught in the very act of adultery, and the woman at the well in John 4.

We've gotten to the point that most of us accept divorce and remarriage, but do we know why? And how? My goal here is to broaden perspective, and stimulate thought.

I will get to it in the time to come, but first, I have to pass an entrance exam by 10 days, put out by the National League For Nursing, in order to get into a pretty good nursing program. And then, if I flunk it, I'll have to wait another 6 months before I can retake it; and if I pass it, I'm going to be that much closer to being an RN. And then, with roughly 10 more online courses, I'm told that I can have my bachelors in nursing, after which I will go on through some Seminary or the other and get my license to preach.

But first things first.

Read ahead and get some footing for a discussion (...perhaps just a monologue) on divorce, remarriage and adultery.

Probably not a favorite subject.

What Part About "The Fear of God" Don't I Understand?

Well, none of it. I don't get any of it.

Why not? It says to fear the Lord in the New Testament, plain as day, several times.

I just don't get it.

Primarily because something greater than fear is here.

God's new covenant does not explain to us how or why to fear the Lord. And it does tell us why 'not' to fear Him. More inconsistencies? Contradictions?

It does at times reiterate the fear that the nation of Israel was governed by. But then Christ came with the gift of grace. Deliverance by His own sacrifice in return for faith. An assurance apart from the Law. And apart from ethnicity or nationality.

The same way James telling us that 'faith without works is dead' - and presumably then so are you if your faith isn't accompanied by the requisite works - does not mean that it takes faith plus works to equal salvation. Algebra comes to our rescue. We are saved to God through faith. (Did you know that several mainstream branches of theology can be disproved through simple algebra?)

Let's divide the word(fear) rightly. There are at least two different Greek words translated as "fear" in our biblical manuscripts. Probably more. Doesn't matter. Let them all mean 'fear'. Being afraid.

But now, something greater than fear is here. It's the grace of God. The free gift of lovingkindness in exchange for desiring God. Not desiring eternal life only, for he who seeks to save his own life will lose it, but for desiring God. Loving Him for what He has done and why.

And 'love' castes out 'fear'.

In Ephesians 4, Paul gets on his knees before the Father and prays that we understand this. In his words, that we 'comprehend' and 'know' this. The depth of Christ's love with which He is calling us back to Him. Being rooted and grounded in love. This is where the power is. God's power toward us that resides in our inner man. His Spirit. And it's not the Spirit of fear. It's His amazing grace which has it's beginnings in His amazing love.

The spirit of fear is something that dates back to before each of our personal conversions. We are told to have a memory of it. When we were sons of disobedience. Before we heard and believed God. Before we knew and comprehended the gospel. What part of the gospel? Simply that God has visited us in Jesus and wants our attention.

What is left of fear as a believer. Either love castes it out or it does not.

Is what we are to fear now actually ourselves 'falling back into unbelief'? Not absolutely. Perhaps, if that's the way we feel, then it is ourselves we should fear? Not God. Then, if that is what happens, it seems there would then have to be a falling 'out' of love, and then a falling back 'into' fear. Wouldn't it? It should. But can you have both at the same time? Can the two exist together? Surely, in the nation of Israel it did, but they did not have Christ?

And there's much more to be said. But fortunately no hurry. My clothes are done. I'm at the laundry. Thank you Lord for Wi-fi and a little extra money to be able to afford a laptop. I discovered what Wi-fi is at the laundromat and then two hours later I owned a laptop. Well actually my credit card company owns it. Yikes.

Agate and Bond Falls, UP Michigan

We like da water der.

And then I was worried something like a log was going to come over the falls and land on my head so I panicked and got out.

Simplicity

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Any intelligent fool can make things bigger, more complex, and more violent.
It takes a touch of genius - and a lot of courage - to move in the opposite direction.
(Albert Einstein)

Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication.
(Leonardo da Vinci)
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There

_________Guess who these guys are.

Last Night I Talked to a Man.

Last night I talked to a man who said he's been waiting his whole life for me to call. He had one simple question, the answer to which everyone around him knew but would not tell him. A question not many of us have. Why did he not have the name of his father on his birth certificate? The name all of his brothers and sisters had? Who was his father?

When I told him who I was he didn't know how he could ever even thank me enough. That he's been waiting his whole life to hear someone tell him the truth in this regard.

We're brothers.

Can a man have a half brother? I can't. Did the sons of Jacob, the nation of Israel, consider themselves half brothers? They came from a total of four different mothers. The Lord's own family from which He said all the nations of the world would be blessed. Did the Lord refer to them as half brothers? No, He did not. Did they refer to themselves as half brothers? No. Either a man is a brother or he's not. This guy is my younger brother; whether I like it or not. He's a gift. And, on top of that, he's a very neat guy. What a blessing the Lord has delivered to both of us.

Does he have any idea of the initiating I have stored up for a younger brother?

I talked to him for three hours last night. I'll meet him, finally, this Saturday. He's coming right up from downstate.

Hey, How About That . . a Half Brother.(Let me put that a little differently)

So I just found my half brother. To the best of my knowledge, my only half brother.

What does that mean?

I'm not sure what that means to me. I've always had a brother. A sister. I know who my father is, always have, and I even grew up with him; all the way until I was 13. I don't think it ever even dawned on him, when the time came that he had to go, to have a regular visitation schedule with me once he left. I know it didn't to me. I was only puzzled as to why my mother hadn't asked him to go sooner. The marriage just never did work. I wrote him a letter soon after he left asking him not to go, stand up to mom, not to give up on the family. But he wrote back and said that my mother's mind was made up, and that it was probably for the better. I silently agreed with him, but, poooofff!!!, there went the family. I wanted to have it both ways.

I thought it was a no-brainer; the family had been dead in the water for years; I thought this was just meant to be. There was even a sense of relief. I just didn't want to let anybody off the hook! What do you mean failure? Come here Dad, I thought, . . . you're a Dad. . . don't you know that there is no room in my vocabulary for a failed Dad of mine?

Our Pastor counseled my mother and father that he could not see any point in their staying together. One would hope a Pastor would put up a little more of a fight than that. But it was over. And to me it was none too soon. But yet, perhaps a little bit too...

But there was something I didn't know; that my Dad had had an infidelity with his cousins wife, which had resulted in the birth of a baby boy. My mother got the hospital bill in the mail from the boy's mother the following year.

I guess I'm glad not knowing how I would have handled that bit of information at that time in my life.

So a divorce ensued and my Dad went on to achieve, by any gracious standard, even lesser things in life. But he tried to stay close to the family for a while and deserves credit for doing the best that he was able.

But back to the boy, Robert, who is no longer a boy but a young man in his mid forties.

I found out about him 3-4 years ago in a conversation with my mother. I was immediately upended by the thought that, "What if he were wondering who I was?". I certainly did wonder about him.

Last week there was the death of his uncle, my second cousin. Through a series of unlikely events the announcement of that fact wound up in my email box. I googled the obituary and found all the names and locations of the people I'd been unable to locate the past year. Two phone calls and one email later and I connected up with an Uncle Bill who was glad to help by contacting Robert's mother and locating Robert.

So what does this mean? To him?

Am I sort of an unsolicited nusaince?

Do I need this? I'm 50 years old. Is it not a little late to find out about a half sibling?

Does it even matter to him?

It would to me.

So. . .

Does he know who his father is?

I assume he does.

Has he met him? I'll just figure he has.

If the young man has met his father(my father), then I know what the young man went away from that meeting with, and I know it wasn't much. I know the father did not need or even know what to do with another son. I know that. And I'll assume the son has accepted that and has dealt with it. And that's what brings us here to this intriguing question.

What does it mean now? That is, what would it mean if . . . "I were in his shoes"?

Let's face it. . . some people are not introspective; and if you're not really sure what I mean when I say that, or even question whether or not you even need to be introspective, then you are probably not.

It means that if I were in his shoes then, would I appreciate knowing that there is still a healthy natural family instinct in some who want to reach out and make sure that their own are o.k.; because it is healthy, and it is good, and you've got to because no one else will.

It means if there are some blanks he still needs filled in about the rest of his chemistry, his genetics, his lineage, his kin, that, I've got some of the answers he has to have.

It means, if he needs it, he's got an open book about his natural father.

And that's important. It means if he has a curiosity about these things he has somewhere to take it.

If it were me, that would be a big one folks. A real big one.

And, all I need to know now is that he's o.k.; wherever this world has taken him.

And then I can be o.k.

But not until I know.

So. . . I will now find out.

I Sing Mighty Power of God (. . . Or Do I ?)

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Well, here it is again. I Sing the Mighty Power of God. I did re-sing this one this week. I had a few extra hours this week and well. . . , I have been working on my voice. I did a little experimenting with it as well. I'll continue to go somewhere with it.

The instrumentation is the same as it was when I first recorded it three years ago. It was my first attempt with my bedroom based 8-track, "studio-in-a box" recorder, and I have about a day and a half into it. I naively recorded this one in such a way as the only thing I can change is the vocal.

So I'll just go on now and re-record this one instrumentally this summer -- Lord willing. I thoroughly enjoyed recording this hymn and there are some real fun things about it that I am going to enjoy developing, but it requires time, and that is something I really don't have much of right now. But then. . . there's all eternity. I Hope you find something encouraging in it all.

And then of course, stay assured(or perplexed), I will continue trying to do something with my voice. Even someone else singing would be nice.
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And How Could He Know This?

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Friedrich Nietzsche (1844-1900) - philosopher
"The person lives most beautifully who does not reflect upon existence"
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As the old joke goes. Nieitzsche said that, "To do is to be!"; Aristotle said, "to be is to do!", and then of course Sinatra said, "It's Do-be-do-be-dooo...". And Sinatra was probably the closest.

But I would say a person lives most beautifully who reflects mightily on existence yet is careful not to obsess upon it too much.

One can very easily wind up like this great philosopher Nietzsche, perplexed, and befuddled as to the meaning of anything. Well, apart from his terrible mental breakdown later in life.

We take care of how and where and from whom we draw our wisdom.

God appeared such as He had been telling men for a long time that He would, in fact appearing to them from the beginning of recorded time, and then He absolutely astonished the world through His last visit and the things He revealed to us.

And then He gave us a lasting gift as He sent forth His Spirit into the very minds and bodies of all who would look and answer His simple call to come, to see, and know, that it is true, that it is He, and He wants them back.

He's joined Himself to those who call on His name. Those who can tear their hearts and minds away from the pleasures of the world long enough to see. . . 'it's Maker', and His more beautiful plan.

Ohhh. . . ------------------that beautiful tearing sound!

A Handy Thing for Those of Us Without the Gift of Tongues

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Vielen Dank an der Herr, unser Gott aus allen von uns.

Just click here, plug it in the box and set it to translate from German to English.

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I had a blessing today...

A light green egg. Or is it blueish? I think the chicken is starting to decide what color her eggs are going to be. I think green. From an Arcana chicken. They tend to lay eggs of that color. This is the first one. A Robin's egg is much brighter but less of a meal than this one.

I decided yesterday to learn German. Deutsch. I had a year of it high school. As well as a year of Spanish. I walked up to a man and said "No schpreckenzie Deutsch". But rather than feeling satisfied in knowing how to clearly communicate that fact to him - as I had intended - instead I felt very stupid. And rightfully so.

I could be very useful as an interpreter and a teacher to plain church people - of the Anabaptist variety - here and over there. And they do need help. We all do. That fact not diminished. . ., they really need help. It won't be my help but just me assisting in the Lord's work, since He has privileged us all to serve Him and each other through Himself. And there is possibly no greater joy here on earth.

The Developmental Psychology reading assignments for my first college class have been very interesting. Like theological theories psychological theories are organized, coherent sets of specific information that helps us understand, explain and make predictions. By definition they are neither right or wrong. Don't let the foundation of your knowledge 'of', and 'in' the Lord, be based on a theory.

Of course, Jesus said He is telling us these things that so when they came to pass. . . we would know that He is the One whom He said He is.

And I just misquoted scripture didn't I? Or did I?

Actually He says "then you will 'believe' that I am He".

But He means that you will "know". And that is 'why' we know; and that is 'why' we believe!

I'm using TellMeMore German language training software. $300.00, that my credit card seems to believe I have - and, I suspect I may - and, it will be here in two days.

I'm terribly excited.

It's all just a bunch of terribly hard work ahead, but. . . , work in the Lord is Spiritual rest.

Wish me a ton of hard work.

In A "Brave New" Electronic World

I was reading the news yesterday and came across this report.

So I found the ex-step-father on the web, who seems to be a very influential family court lawyer in Brazil, and I wrote him this email:

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Re: the boy

"You've got a very important decision to make.

The boy will ultimately have wanted to exercise his right to have his natural father.

Nor does this child belong to it's grandparents.

If you desire to do the honorable thing by the boy then return the boy to his father and visit him occassionally. Not everyone would have the financial means to do that. But you do. I'm guessing that this boys father would be more than happy to accomodate your and the boy's friendship. As well as your mother-in-law.

Consider yourself fortunate if you never have a child abducted. I can tell you this with great assuredness, yet, I was fortunate enough to get mine back. May you never feel what this boy's father has felt.

Be careful, this boy needs you to do the right thing.

The Lord's peace to you.

Todd
www.toddsaunders.us"

One does what one can.

One does what one has to.

Writing

Shall I learn to write? I should better say so. And it would be about time.

If I'm going to start back to school in January for nursing, learn again the algebra, geometry, physics and etc. plus, alas, nursing, then why not learn how to effectively put my thoughts down in print while I'm at it. Maybe I'll find out, finally, that I have nothing to say? That would be a burden lifted.

And so I will.

Wow. I've found the neatest website that makes learning to write so easy for me to understand. It's right here. Capital Commuity College Foundation.

I can't tell you how many times I've gone back to my second from last blog entry and was aghast at my inability to get the grammar right - even the thoughts right - ; re-writing it and re-writing it. Running on and on, never knowing how to punctuate, arrange or defragmentize. What an opportunity this will be. By learning to write I can finally clear my mind of all this rubbish that I feel I have to put in order, knowing how better to use 'what' or 'which' or 'this' or 'that'.

I've Resisted the Devil. He's Fled! ...I'm Goin Out After Him.

And that, is that.

Thank you.

We can thank Christ when He says through James: (4:7), "Submit therefore to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you.

The Lord's Supper [follow-up]

Here's what got me thinking on the Lord's supper.

Since I could not participate in 'communion' as a non-member at the church I regularly attend, I decided to go to the next 'plain' church 45 minutes away, so as not to have to sit around on communion Sunday and get bored. I'd known these 'plain' folks for about two years and we considered each other faithful brothers.

So the following Sunday, as I finishing up conversation and was getting ready to leave late in the afternoon, here came the sales pitch, and it was explained to me that I needed to submit to a church. For Jesus said that, 'if you don't eat of this body and drink of this blood you can have no part in me'. It was explained to me therefore, that, sooner or later I was going to have to submit to a brotherhood or, implicitly, I could have no part in Jesus. It was also suggested to me that I could not be a member of that church if I was not going to be there regularly. And the church I was presently attending was also not acceptable because of their gospel message fell short.

I was not acceptable for membership in the church I was already attending due to my use of musical instruments and some forms of technology such as the Internet. The two churches in question where simply not acceptable to each other. Nor was any other church, to either one of them. To them, in joining any other church than their 'own' respective church, I would be falling away from the true faith.

So what is a poor fellow to do?

So now, I can't have a part in Jesus in any other way than but through the brotherhood? I thought the Reformation had already occured and that it was already widely known that men can't place themselves between God and men?

Do you see my predicament here?

Has anybody read the book "Catch 22"?

Is this really where some men think Christ has left us?

Well of course it's not where He's left us.

I didn't come right out and charge him with trying to be the Pope. I simply saw it as a good opportunity, even a necessity, to go home and plan for the following Sunday a Lord's Supper celebration at my place. By myself. Others optional. Membership in Christ's Body is all that is required. Others are welcome, but not necessary.

The more I thought about it the more I realized I had been asleep on the issue here and that there was a vital and important spiritual exercise I had been passing up.

Oh! The new found joy that I had only before taken for granted. Christ's invitation was actually for even me!

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This morning is the Lord's Supper Sunday morning celebration. I dropped my ten year old daughter off at church, fed the animals and came inside.

My bread had come out of the oven about an hour ago. It smelled great and I thanked the Lord for it. A few minutes earlier, on my way in, I started to plan. My immediate inclination was to go to the Gospels for the Lord's instructions and start there. But then I remembered them very well already, and, wasn't I supposed to already know the instructions and actually go on and 'commune' with a memory here? Sure the Body and the Blood, but 'what' was that an invitation to remember?

Weren't those instructions permission to open the floodgate of rich memories about the Man who was... God, revealing Himself to us and calling us to reunite back to Him in His Kingdom? All expenses paid! For free? Not for free!; but for an immense price, which, 'He' has already paid, Himself!, for us? That such a magnificent thing is not free! But [yet], yes, it 'is' already paid for -- by Him. With His Body and His blood. Instead of ours...for us, because we can't pay it, but are allowed to eat of the sacrifice, and drink of His sacrifice, with thanksgiving, as we remember His sacrifice, and the love for us He has that caused Him to 'be' the sacrifice, and consequently be punished and put to death, instead of us. And that, while we would have stayed dead, and deservedly so, He did not, so that, through faith, we would not.

Uh-oh...that is truly difficult to comprehend. But there it was, and there it happened.

But oh...,it's true. Through the witness and subsequent testimony -- and, ohhh...the blessed memory -- of those faithful witnesses who saw it! and testified of it!, -- of God having come down to earth to walk among us -- and the indelible memory they were shown, of God Himself! testifying to us, through them, after which they could not help but to keep telling everyone, and anyone they could get to, of, it!, until their dieing day, and that!, is how we remember!

Oh yes,...I remember now.... And thank you for that reminder...it is a rich memory, and, I am going to cherish the opportunity to abide there in it now. Whew. When - do - we - - - start?

In just about every "communion" I'd ever been a part of, there was usually a sermon, after which were read Jesus' instructions, then we ate, and then drank, and that was about it. There was very little remembering -- if any. At least 'time' given to it. Not any moreso than during your average Sunday service that is. Maybe that winds up to be the difference between, "communion", and the Lord's Supper. It was promoted as 'communion', but there was not so much communing being done. And not even that much "Lord's supper" being done. Maybe it was just me. I will allow, that, it was just me. And, that those days are now over.

So... I remembered....

God..., had come to earth with great news. And this... He did not want me to forget.

My very memory of Him was meaningful to 'Him'; He wanted 'it' there. And so, if it is a meaningful thing to Him, then it is a great blessing for me, to possess... and abide in.

So I let my memory unfold itself. I remembered what He had done in my life. And in my daughter's life. And in my remembering... I was free to laugh, and cry, or to just shout out; and marvel; at will, and, in private.

And I ate...and remembered...and I ate...and I remembered.

Of course the dog had to make an appearance. "Do I throw her the crumbs, or not, I thought?" ...I thought, not.

I went to the Spirit of Christ in me and I just abode there in thought. Not asking. Not telling. Not seeking wisdom. Nor comfort. Just seeking memories from His Word, which God had left us a memory full of, of His having come to His earth; in the flesh; to reveal Himself; to His creation.

Remembering also the promise He had made when He had come. The promise that He would pour out His Spirit on us when He left. And the promise that He would return again, and that, until He came back, His Spirit would dwell here with us, inside of us, until He came back.

Remembering again what He's done in my life. And what He's done in the lives of many people I know.

Remembering what He said about things to come. And remembering what I can do in anticipation of those things.
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This thing would not be complete without mentioning that someone from church then showed up. I confess, I had not invited anyone. But they were concerned about me. I was concerned that they might be concerned me... and show up. My memorial celebration came to an abrupt halt much sooner than I had planned. He came primarily because he had been hoping to wash my feet. I appreciated that. We appreciate each other. After a long discussion (unfortunately on something all we Christians can share in common -- that is, misguided denominational doctrine), and, in spite of it, we washed each others feet, broke bread and drank from the cup. I lectured him on coming not to understand the issues that divide us but to simply further his own poorly thought out opinions(to which in all fairness should be added "in my opinion"). I had him thinking anyway. Always make sure your are invited to a Lord's Supper or risk being uncerimoniously 'judged' by the host.

When he left, it was hard to get going again. And it was no longer necessary. There's no need to wallow overly long at one sitting in Christ's memorial. I had had almost an hour in it and that had been sufficient. Subsequently more important is the present and the future. There's now plenty more to do, the more of which, will make my next Lord's Supper equally as rewarding.

He said, "do this, as often as you drink it, in remembrance of me".

I'm going to do this every three or four months.

Amen.